Coping Isn't Cutting It Anymore
Let’s be honest—we are all really in one lately. Like, GOING THROUGH IT. And we’re talking long-term stress stuff, not nicely packaged short-term stressors. The motivation to write this article now comes from just how genuinely uneasy so many people feel about what the future holds. And let’s be real—many of you have probably felt this way since 2020. So maybe this is even long overdue.
Let’s Rethink “Helpful” Coping Tools
I want to directly take aim at things we often pitch as “helpful” but that actually make very little difference in managing long-term stress.
We’re great at offering up quick fixes like breathing exercises, meditation, yoga, and working out. And to be clear—those aren’t bad things. But how long can breathing really help you cope with mandatory overtime, week after week? How much running or lifting can actually erase the weight of watching the worst of human behavior unfold, day after day?
The Real Stressors We Ignore
These tools just don’t touch the core issues that really weigh on people. A 2019 study examining stressors in the first responder community (Purba & Demou, 2019) found that the biggest stressors weren’t traumatic events. They were:
- Lack of support from superiors
- Long work hours (over 49 per week)
- Stress from coworkers and supervisors
- Effort-reward imbalance
None of those issues are solved with meditation or yoga mats. So the question becomes—what actually helps?
What Does Help: Building Anti-Fragile Individuals Who Are Stress-Ready
There’s growing research showing that a person’s psychological health before a crisis matters significantly in how well they recover afterward. That’s where anti-fragility comes in—not just bouncing back, but growing stronger under stress. So what defines a "resilient" or anti-fragile individual? They are:
1. Self-Aware
People with good self-awareness know their own temperature and make more informed choices about what their next actions will be. Simply put, they have more data to make the next decision.
2. Self-Regulated
When individuals are capable of managing their own thoughts, emotions, and behaviors to get a desired result, they tend to also get better outcomes. This leads to higher self-efficacy and feelings of greater control.
3.) Mentally Flexible
Being able to adapt and change to new circumstances and information without getting bent out of shape is associated with higher overall satisfaction with life. When you move with the challenges instead of putting up resistance, people also tend to spend less time brooding and sitting in inaction and more time coming up with a variety of solutions. This ultimately increases self-efficacy and confidence.
4.) Optimistic (i.e. don’t automatically view the world through Sh*t -colored glasses)
A common occupational hazard when you’re in the business of responding to bad things is to start to move to a more cynical mindset. When people maintain a more optimistic mindset, they tend to be more future focused and less stuck on what is uncomfortable in the here-and-now.
5.) Know their Values
Individuals who know what is important to them tend to be more likely to act in line with their values when making difficult decisions. Using their values to make tough decisions allows most to cope better with the outcomes of their decisions, even if it isn’t exactly what they desired.
6.) Well Connected
Statistically, this is possibly even the most powerful when it comes to prevention of post-traumatic stress. Very simply put, life is hard. Going through it alone is even harder. There are very few things people fear more than getting kicked out of their “tribe," so the stronger their social connections, the more rooted they feel in their group or tribe, the more likely they are to be able to withstand stress. It lowers the fear of being removed from the tribe, which technically has survival impacts rooted in evolution.
Anti-Fragile Teams are Built, Not Born
The same research that revealed the top workplace stressors also points toward a clear solution: building strong team dynamics before stress hits—taking action left of bang (pre-event) to strengthen recovery and resilience right of bang (post-event). What this looks like:
1.) Choose Your Leaders Wisely
The formal and informal leadership in a group or team is critical for setting the cultural norms of what is accepted, rejected, tolerated, and praised. That leader has a significant ability to cultivate an environment pre- incident that will impact post incident recovery.
2.) Make Culture Explicit
- Heuristics: Phrases or sayings that quickly help members of the team remember their values, priorities, and behaviors
- Artifacts: Visual or physical reminders of shared pride and meaning
- Stories: Retold experiences that instill values and shape identity
3. Prioritize Social Bonds
Research has pretty consistently shown that one of the primary protective factors against developing PTSD is the strength of the social group PRE-event.
For example, one study examined the rates of PTSD post-natural disaster among a community. The members with weak social connections demonstrated a 12% rate of PTSD. Those with strong social connections pre-event demonstrated only a 2.5% frequency of PTSD. (Feng, Tan, Benjamin & Wen et. al. 2007)
4.) Align Around a Shared Mission
When people know what they are doing, why they are doing it, and where they are going, they tend to feel a higher sense of security and psychological safety. This ultimately contributes to a better overall team dynamic, especially in high-risk roles.
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